Celebrate imperfect
Practice gratitude
I’ve been reminded recently that gratitude is a wonderful tool. When we focus on what is going well instead of what doesn’t go as expected or wanted, our brain sees that as an assignment to find more examples of what is going well. Often, this snowballs into a grateful feeling that can dissipate frustration or angst, and reorient you to the whole experience.
Note: I had nothing to do with my grandma’s home design. I find her style and choices inspiring.
This past weekend, I took a trip to visit my grandma in Iowa. I’ve been meaning to take this trip for over 6 months. It’s a 5-6 hour drive, and I brought my six-and-a-half year old son along. My grandma is a great art enthusiast, and a talented artist herself. She has all sorts of connections to the art, artisan, gallery, and museum communities in her area. She graciously mapped out a variety of activities for us on Saturday to different venues and places of interest, including a private visit to a local artist’s in-home studio.
In the wee hours of Saturday morning, we were waylaid by illness. All our plans for Saturday ended up being cancelled, and we were “stuck” at home at my grandma’s house. My initial thoughts were This is SO disappointing and Of course this would happen and Our whole trip is ruined. But when I talked to my grandma about it, she was so calm, cool, and collected. She raised 6 kids herself and has many grandchildren and great-grandchildren, so she knows that these things happen, and she exuded no pressure for the weekend to proceed perfectly as planned. Her response was something along the lines of “I’m just grateful you’re here,” and that set the tone for the whole day.
Perfection in the imperfection
After we changed our plans, my grandma gave me a tour of her home instead of touring other venues. She has a beautiful home that she has filled with art, antiques, color and meaningful pieces. It is a joy to spend time there, and especially for me as an interior designer and art-lover, there is a feast for the eyes and inspiration in every corner. We spent the day chatting and catching up. We talked about art, design, spirituality, community, and human connection. And it turns out it was just as lovely, if not more so, to spend focused, thoughtful time together rather than running all over town.
As an added bonus, when plans change or you’re facing the unexpected, often the people around you will step up to support you, in ways you never could have planned for. The artist we were supposed to visit went out of her way to make a video tour of her studio that she sent specifically for us! (check out Mary Zeran's work here - it’s so unique, colorful, and stunning!) And my aunt and uncle brought us dinner from the restaurant we were supposed to meet them at that evening. Talk about more opportunities to focus on gratitude!
The weekend looked nothing like the productive, ideal itinerary we had planned. If you think about it, aren’t most days like that? We plan and perfect and perfect and plan. But usually life has other ideas. I have a sticky note next to my desk that says “Everything is in flow, and that is what is PERFECT.” This was a great reminder to go with the flow, and trust that you will get where you need to go. It might be a different path than you expected, but if you focus on the path you thought you would take instead of the path you’re actually on, you’ll miss the unexpected joys that arise on the detour.
~Rachel
